When you’re overwhelmed with tasks, these two questions can help lighten the load

Is it just me, or is your plate overflowing with too many things to do?

I’ve talked with so many clients lately who are feeling overwhelmed with the sheer number of things they need to get done by the end of the year. And some days I feel overwhelmed too!

But let me offer two short & simple questions to ask yourself that may just help you find some lightness in your to-do list.

Question 1: What’s the easiest way to do this?

This is a question my beloved former coach Larry Peers helped me come up with years ago, at a moment when I felt like I was drowning in half-completed projects and emails that kept piling up.

In particular, there was one project that had me really flustered.

From my heart to yours: Thank you!

Hello everyone—

Today I want to say thank you.

Thank you so much for your trust, whether you’ve been reading my posts for a while now or you’re brand-new to this site.

In this hectic world, it means so much to me that you’re open to engaging with me in this ongoing conversation about spirituality and living in a way that brings you joy.

To everyone I’ve had the privilege to work with, I want you to know that you inspire me every day. It is an incredible honor to witness your dreams and struggles, your insights and accomplishments, your courage and grace, your strength, humor, and resilience. Thank you for being my teachers.

And to each and every one of you reading this today, thank you for all the ways you show up and bless this world simply by being yourself.

Are you really allowed to arrange your life in a way that works for you?

Do you ever feel like somehow you don’t have the right to arrange your life in a way that really works for you? Let me tell you right now: You do. You absolutely do.
And yet, if you’re like many sensitive or intuitive people, you may be feeling a lot of pressure to contort yourself into conforming with other people’s expectations of what you should be doing.
Recently, I’ve worked with a number of clients to explore some changes they wanted to make in their life. With each of these brilliant, wise people, two things were clear right away:
1) They each knew how they wanted things to be. I mean, they were all absolutely clear on what they would change to make their life better, more sustainable, more productive, and more fun. Some of these changes involved re-setting expectations with family members or workmates, but none of them were drastic or draconian.
2) However: None of them believed they could actually pull it off. Why? Because they feared that these changes, which they wanted to make for their own well-being, would disappoint people they cared about. Now, they weren’t worried that the people around them would be angry! Just worrying that they might be disappointing someone close to them was almost enough to stop them from even trying.
Does that sound familiar to you?

Do you ever get angry at the source of the universe?

It’s been a hard few days on planet Earth. So much suffering. So many people, just trying to live their lives, in the wrong place at the wrong time, caught up in violence and death. So many beings of all kinds, seeking safety and finding none.
Sometimes I get so angry about it all. Why haven’t we figured out how to be better to one another, after so many millennia, so many generations? What is wrong with people?!
But when I really sit with it, I realize this:
The one I’m really angry with is the One who created this universe in the first place.
Call it God/dess, Spirit, Mystery, or any of the thousands of names for the unthinkable, unimaginable creative force beyond everything—that which brought forth this material universe, and this little planet, and we embodied beings.
That’s who I’m angry at. Because, seriously: Who thought it was a good idea to create this planet and set it up so that we’re all in these vulnerable, fragile bodies that hurt and break down and die?

What if it isn’t all in your head?

A while back, a client shared a spiritual experience they’d had that was very meaningful to them. But, they asked, “What if it was all in my head?”
I can relate. Especially if you grew up in a secular home, as I did, it is so easy to dismiss even the most powerful spiritual experiences as meaningless, unreliable, a mere trick of the mind.
And yet, what if those experiences are not meaningless?
What if they’re the very opposite of unreliable?

Feeling burned out? Here’s a way to get un-stuck. (Hint: You are not the problem!)

Does this sound like you, or anyone you know?
Work used to light you up on the inside. It was fun and challenging. You were excited about using your gifts to help people—to make a real difference!
But somewhere along the way, that changed.
These days, you’re feeling exhausted, wrung out, burned out. It’s especially disturbing to realize that, some days, you can’t seem to care any more about the people you’re there to serve. Where your heart used to overflow with tenderness and compassion, now you feel numb.
You’re still pretty good at going through the motions. But inside, the spark is gone. And that’s scary. You know it’s not good for you, or the people you serve.
Maybe you dream about quitting. But you need the money. You feel trapped.
And then there’s the shame. Other people seem to be able to handle it just fine—why can’t you? You worry that maybe it’s your fault, like the problem here is you.
But you are not the problem.

A message for someone—maybe you?  

I do a lot of shamanic journeying as part of my personal spiritual practice. I’ve known most of my compassionate helping spirits for quite a few years now, and sometimes they nudge me to come check in with them if they have something particular to say. Like someone saying a friendly, “Hey, there!” in my brain.
So the other day, I got a pretty strong nudge from one of my spirit friends to pull out my tarot and oracle decks and pull some cards, because she had a message for the folks I work with.
I’m not an expert tarot reader by any means. But this compassionate helping spirit likes working with cards. She often tells me to go pull a card or two as a sort of shorthand for a message she has for me. Pull the card, listen to what she says it means, look up the traditional meaning and see what lands.
So that’s what we did. And the message she had this time was about what she wanted you all to know. Or rather, I don’t know if it’ll resonate with everyone who reads this, but maybe it will for you. In a nutshell, it was about reclaiming your power, re-grounding in the midst of change, and rediscovering the spiritual abundance that is always with you.
So here you go. I made a quick video so you could see the decks and the cards….

Does it ever feel scary to be honest about what you need?

Recently I was working with a client I’ll call Maya. (I’ve changed all the details to protect her privacy.) Maya told me she was looking forward to seeing an old friend soon. They’d met back in high school and stayed close in the decades since. Though it had been years since they’d lived in the same city, they’d visited back and forth many times.
Now Maya was planning another trip to stay with her friend for the weekend. She told me she was excited to see her friend, but also oddly anxious about it. They hadn’t been fighting or anything like that. Why was she feeling so uneasy about visiting one of her closest friends in the world?
I invited Maya to sit with that feeling of uneasiness for a while, just inviting it to reveal whatever was ready to be revealed.
After a minute or so, Maya took a deep breath and said, “I think I know what’s going on. I love my friend, but I always feel like I can’t get enough alone-time when I’m there. We spend hours talking, and I love that, but I also need my quiet time to be alone and read or just think or whatever.”
Maya paused and thought some more. “It might not sound like such a big deal, but I think it might actually be part of something bigger. I have this weird feeling like I can’t ask for what I need, because it would be rude, or maybe she would think I didn’t care about spending time with her. And I do want to spend time with her—it’s so good to see her! I just need some down time too. So I end up feeling like I’m sort of fighting myself and hiding what I’m really thinking, and it all feels weird and messed up.”

How to get clear when you’re struggling with a tough decision

What about the big, important decisions that matter a lot, but you just can’t figure out what to do?
Clients often arrive struggling with decisions like this. Like whether to leave a job or a relationship that’s grown painfully difficult. Or whether to keep working toward something really important—a project, a dream—when it just doesn’t seem to be working.
At times like these, it can be really hard to decide what to do. There may be a lot at stake. You can’t know what the future will bring. And yet, you know it’s important to make a decision and move forward, one way or the other.
In those moments, a simple embodied practice I use with clients may help you gain clarity on what path really feels best for you….

Feeling jealous? Here’s a simple trick to transform your jealousy into joy.

On the first day of a new class, I walked into the room and found a seat. Looking around at the other participants, my eyes were drawn to a woman on the other side of the circle. She sat calmly, comfortable in her own skin, self-contained and poised.

Meanwhile, I was feeling anxious inside. Questions rattled around my busy brain: would anyone like me? Would I like them? Did I forget to bring anything I needed? When would lunch be?

I glanced again at the woman across the circle, so calm and relaxed. A jolt of jealousy hit me. I wanted to be that person who was calm, confident, untroubled by anxious worryings. But I wasn’t that person.

Or was I?

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